When CCP switched out the Scorpion a couple of years back, from being a wonky Lego-like fiddler crab to a design that was more in keeping with it’s animal namesake, a fair few people complained. I didn’t. The old Scorpion was in my view a hideous abomination that was barely improved upon by the Trinity expansion, so to see the old carapace prized off and replaced was a marked improvement. Not so much that I would ever want to be seen flying one, but enough of an upgrade that blowing one out of the sky no longer felt beneath me.
With the recent replacement of the Maller and it’s variants, it almost feels like those dissident voices that loved the original Scorp are having some kind of revenge. The new Maller hull is a sleek bird of prey with a trademark plunging prow; as Maller-esque as it’s possible to be. But, like the re-imagined cars that throng the urban streets – the Beetles, Minis and Fiat 500s – the new seems to lack the classic austere personality of the old. Unlike the unwieldy old Scorpion, the old Maller was a classic long before it was forced to give way to a faux. It was like the hammer-forged helmet of a Teutonic knight – indomitable and fearless. The new Maller is like something a child would be forced to put on their head by a over-bearing parent before they were allowed to climb aboard a tricycle. I mean it’s okay, but it’s nothing like that ship I once aspired to own back in 2003.
Rather than be downcast, I can’t help but feel like the retired classics will one day return. It’s not inconceivable that the new Maller might be renamed the Mk. II, while the old version is retrograded to become the Mk. I (likewise for the Sacrilege and Devoter) and returned to the market in limited edition form. It would be a crying shame if the old model was lost to history as some kind of mistake that waited too long to be corrected. The design is far too iconic to be left to rust on the design scrapheap.
My only hope is that if/when it does return, it’s not exclusive to the Noble Exchange. It was difficult enough getting the currency together to afford it the first time around. I’ll be damned if I have to do it all over again when I have a monocle to save up for.